close your eyes and dream

Sometimes I feel as though I'm watching the world pass me by..
Waiting. Always waiting.
Eyes set on the horizon searching for my white horse to come and take me away.
Hoping I'll find solace in words, ink, music, money, networking, romance.

But after just a moment when the new becomes old and the excitement fades away you still close your eyes every night to the same person.
The same thoughts. The same memories. The same insecurities.

You can change your clothes.
You can change your job.
You can change your significant other.
You can change the size on the back of your jeans.
You can change WHAT you are.
You can change WHERE you are.
But none of that matters unless you are okay with WHO you are.

smile often

A reminder

"Dear Beth,

21 years down... many more to go hopefully. I'm not one to make a big deal of milestones, and I reckon you're similar to me, but think of it this way - you've got 21 years of experience at this thing called life. You may not realise it but you've got a lot of accumulated wisdom.

I encourage you to share it with others.

I like you because you're a thinker. You think for yourself. Sadly, there aren't many like you these days, especially inside the church!

So I encourage you to share, speak, blog, write a book.. Do all the those things. And may you inspire others to think for themselves, and most importantly, to discover God for themselves

Happy Birthday
From Grant"

I found this card today, it made tears come to my eyes, I'm not going to lie.
It reminded me of my goal, my future, what this blog was always meant to be about in the first place.
How easy we get lost. How easy we forget the calling of our hearts.

This was never a popularity contest.

So thankyou to one of my oldest friends Grant.
Thankyou for seeing something in me and for bothering to write it all down in a card.
Thankyou for being a true friend. Even if you're not an "everyday" friend.

I will return now to write of things that stir my soul, even if it doesn't involve fashion pictures.

smile often
Beth

with these cards, I fold.

I find it so funny how in the space of 2 years,

I can go from not knowing someone at all.
To having that person be my entire world.
To not speaking to that person ever again.

I'll never understand the game.

meet.love.leave.repeat.

until somebody, someday stops playing the game and
stays

A faith I can be proud of.

"I’m in a band. I don’t go to church every Sunday. I love punk rock music. Sometimes I use swear words a lot. I respect and admire gay men and women. I’m obsessed with horror films. I know what shame feels like. And guess what old man? Jesus is still my Savior."
-Hayley Williams.

Done!

I love..

• the smell of summer nights and the taste of spearmint milk.
  
• laying in bed when its cold and raining and knowing I have not a thing to do.
• that moment when you realise that an acquaintance has become a friend.
• conversations that last for hours and yet you walk away feeling like you could have spoken for hours more.
• comfortable silences where you feel like nothing needs to be said for you to feel understood.
• finding THAT song that sums up exactly how you're feeling at that moment.
• that moment after you stop crying and you realise it's not that bad after all.
• reading books until the sun comes up.
• the smell of sprinkles and the sound of crows because it reminds me of being young.
• telling someone they're pretty and watching their face light up.
• laying around with the people you love doing nothing but BEING together.
• Those unplanned nights that turn out perfect and end at 6am
• expreskis from the dome and sushi from jaws.
• taking interest in people and finding out that everyone has a story worth telling.
• personal jokes
• laughing so hard my stomach hurts
• the feeling of being on stage in character (drama nerd)
• making people laugh.
• falling in love for the first time and every time after that
  

If you're doing what you love,
Then you're bulletproof

We stand where we are today because of the choices we have made.


Circumstances may control the tides,
but our choices are the rudder.