Sunday, May 23, 2010
back to basics
Dear inspiration
If you could return soon that would be awfully splendid.
Smile often
Beth
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Its all a bit un PC really
It isn't as important as people dying in 3rd world countries, I'm not questioning my roll in reducing poverty and I'm not giving u snippets into my life that I will then delete when I realise how public blogging is.
Its opinion time. Ill start with my 2 pet hates.
Firstly if you are above a size 14 please proceed to NOT do the following:
1. Wear tights as pants. Nobody wants to see that.
2. Dress like a 50's pinup girl. THEY WERE CURVACEOUS NOT OBESE! a bulge is not a curve people, say it with me now, A bulge is not a curve.
3. Take your clothes off and take pictures for the net. Just because your friend is studying photography, that doesn't make you a model.
4. come into my change rooms at Myer with a size 10 dress. Its not going to fit you and I don't want to have to go get you a size 12, and then 14 and then 16 and then have you leave because it "doesn't look right." Yes, the zip not doing up is never a good look is it dear.
5. Tell me how lucky I am that I can wear the clothes I do. It's awkward I don't know what to say, Yes I'm thinner then you but I wasn't going to point it out, did you really have to?
I feel I must take a moment here to say, I don't dislike overweight females, I have nothing against them as people, Just dress for your size and everyone's happy.
And secondly
If you are a male that has any interest in having a relationship with me please do NOT do the following:
1. Have a southern cross tattoo. Enough said.
2. Tell me I'm "prettier then Jessica Alba" Umm... NO, I'm really not. I'm completely OK with the fact that I'm not. EVERYONE ON THE PLANET KNOWS I'M NOT!! so lets all just be honest here.
3. Tell me how crap your ex girlfriend was. If you can say that about her, who knows what you'll say about me once we break up?
4. Tell me you love me after a week. No you don't, you don't know me after a week. I don't love you, you don't love me. Lets discuss this again in a few months time.
5. Tell me you want to marry me. I'm 21 so I'll save you some time, The answer is no!
6. Throw things at me. Especially a fork. (I threw that in just for kicks)
OK I'm glad I got those off my chest.
Smile often
Beth
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Lessons on Hay street
His day starts with darkness. A struggle to find a white stick and a dog to take the lead. He can't see the sun I take for granted, his sunglasses arn't asthetic, there a shield to hide behind. Others barely talk to him unless they have to and I wonder what is worse, that he can't see people or that people choose not to see him?
smile often
Beth
Dear Self, (and whoever else thinks its worth taking in)
smile often
Beth
Saturday, May 8, 2010
"BOO!"
I took her hand and lead her to her father who was absolutely beside himself with fear. I couldn't help but smile.
That little girl had no idea she was lost, She was having the time of her life in her cubby house of jag and guess.
I miss that childlike curiosity and wonder.
I miss a time before we had to worry about assignments and bills and money and relationships.
I miss a time when all you needed to be happy was a rack of jeans.
Myer became her playground and I was her best friend. I learn so much from children. They know what its all about. We all new how to relax once apon a time and then somewhere along the way we got lost.
Adult and child get seperated.
Adult freaks the hell out.
child finds an adventure.
I love it
smile often
Beth
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Late night listing
security.passion.deep conversation.light banter.good books.touching movies.meeting unfamiliar people.smiling at a stranger.small children.fashion.being inspired.the beach at night.being understood.late night texting.falling in love.traveling.music.art.old peoples stories.that moment when you realise an acquaintance just became a friend.learning.alone time.hearing peoples stories.writting.engaging.watching.family.friends.helping people.sitting in driveways talking because you don't want to walk away just yet.chocolate.sushi.ice tea.frankie magazine.box sets.making a difference.discussions.seeing people achieve their goals.achieving my goals.late nights.poetry.documentaries.tickle fights.italian food.cuddles.debates.humour.looking at Russel Brand...
Sometimes I think its important to define what you believe and makes you happy. I want to focus on these things a little bit more. Especially the looking at Russel Brand bit.
smile often
Beth
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Happiness is a choice
Monday, May 3, 2010
Because this was all getting a bit to serious..
It wasn't.
You see whilst the sun was rising through my window it was not the actual entity that caused me to come to consciousness. Instead it was the sound of my Alarm. Now I can't be sure of what the exact song is that wakes me up every morning at varying degrees of God awful hours because I acquired this phone from a friend and her music taste, for the most part, sucks. (I didn't name names so nobody should take offense.) but what I do know about the song is that at 6.30am, that song is the devil. Also until recently I didn't even know that 6.30pm had a morning version. As far as I knew it was a once a day occurrence that was reserved for dinner and A Current Affair. Thankfully the devil music corrected my ignorance and I'm now well aware of 6.30: Morning edition.
Many things go through my head in the few seconds after I am blasted back into reality from my slumber and most of them consist of more sleep and possible fake doctors notes. But, today I had a quiz and seen as I had missed my last one due to Perths great storm and my great knowledge of survival which caused me to pickup a pay phone knee deep in water and thus get electrocuted, I had no option but to get up and get my arse to uni before I fail my class. So I chose the second most desirable option for that moment.
I pressed snooze.
Because I just knew that in 5 minutes when my alarm went off again I would feel revitalised and ready to take on the day. Yes, 6.35 was definatly a more reasonable wake up call. As I turn over happy with my decision and problem solving abilities, I begin to drift back into sleep. Reality begins to mix with dreams when suddenly
*Insert terrible music here*
I can assure you that at 6.35 the song is still the devil and I still feel like death. Only now I have 5 minutes less time to straighten my hair, thus resulting in a half up do that sits somewhere between school girl and librarian. I'm late leaving the house which means breakfast consists of a V and I have to make the snap decision to run for the bus and risk being.. "that person that ran for the bus and missed it" or play it cool and rock up late to class and risk being.. "that person that missed two quiz's and failed the unit" I chose the first option because my fear of failure out ways my fear of embarrassment and It seems I made the right choice because I got on the bus, met the love of my life and we are now going steady.
..Not really but I did make it to class in time and I can assure you I still failed that quiz
Smile often
Beth
they'll say she changed that day
Fear of rejection.
Fear of failure.
Fear of what people will think.
Fear of what people will say.
Fear of how people will react.
Fear that I'm defective.
Fear that I'm just not enough.
I don't want to be afraid anymore. I want to let it all go, Stop worrying about the future because the truth is that one day I'll be on my death bed and I will not regret so much the things I did as what I didn't do. I do not want to regret living my life in fear of other peoples opinions. I will dance for an audience of one, I will fight for justice and unashamedly live from my heart.
I don't care whats cool.
I don't care who likes me.
I'm not afraid anymore.
Who are you to judge me.
Smile often
Beth